Zero-Dark-Thirty encounter

I think this forum best suits this story.

The brand of motorcycle was never confirmed. I hope you find humor in it.

OK, so I am going to work the other day. It is a ride, just a short one, only 56.3 miles. It is very early, pitch black early.

I am going up a grade I have to go over every day, it is 7% for about 1.5 miles. I am rolling along at my Preferred Cruising Speed, which is 4 MPH slower than the highest speed that I was released with only a warning. I start to hear a weird noise, like a combination of tire cupping, hockey pucks and potholes, it starts to get louder. I look up and ahead of me, way ahead is a single tail light. Then I start to notice the smell, that old, now rare, smell of an engine running way richer than stoich, without a catalytic converter. YUCK!

I slow down a little and change lanes. Still gets louder and smellier, I slow down a little more.

This lasts about half a mile, this is INTOLERABLE. I speed up to 4 MPH faster than my PCS and go around, he should fall behind fairly quickly.

Nope, NOW it seems he wants to go fast, I REALLY don't want this machine in front of me. I speed up a bit more. He has sped up also, OH COME ON, GO AWAY YOU SLUG!! I speed up a bit more, same. He is a ways behind, just far enough that I cannot hear him but he seems to be closing and I am going faster than I would prefer.

I back off the throttle a bit, slowing to 80 (I said is was gong faster than I would prefer)...

And drop silver two gears...

Remember, my gears are named, CruiserPassingAngeryShowoffStarting.

I hear it at about 20 yards out, the machine sounds like it is being beaten, is out of breath and maybe coughing up blood, but still out running its tormentor. It seems to be closing at between 15 and 20 MPH.

As his front axle passes my rear I whack it WOT!

the results were comical.

Silver rears, kicks and accelerates, the loud smelly caricature to my left seems to bounce rearward as if someone had tied a stout bungee cord to his back fender, bouncing into, and out of my field of view in an insanely quick manner.

WHACK! ONE THOUSAND ONE ONE THOU (revlimiter interrupts!) SHIFT! ONE THOUSAND ATHOUSAND TWO ATHOUSAND THREE ATHOUSAND FOUR SHIFT! ATHOUSAND ONE ATHOU check speedo...

Holy cow!!! whoa Whoa WHOA! COAST Coast coast... Silver! Stop trying to get me thrown is jail! Resume PCS

Check for the loud smelly (and now) embarrassed annoyance, It should be all the way to the upcoming town before he catches me.

No sign of him.

I continue on to work feeling slightly guilty for acting the hooligan.

One time I double down shifted from passing gear to showoff gear and whacked the throttle. It wasn't until I was next to the Durango that I noticed the door said, "Utah State Highway Patrol." We had a long interesting conversation and I hadn't even gotten to angry gear yet.

BTW, I still love doing that!!

You guys name your gears?

Hey, that was me on the Harley trying to catch you, you bozo you! :clown:

Sounds like another encounter with the Cuesta Grade Phantom Rider! Either that or it ended when the alarm clock went off!

With the availabilty of 'angry gear' seems that my inner hooligan comes out to play more more than I like to admit. Never really thought about naming the gears, but I like it.

I have a story exactly like this, but it involves my sports car and some Harley rider that thought he could keep me from passing, and when that failed, that he could pass me and get in front of me again.

The other story involved the FJR and was during the final running of the Utah 1088. I was on UT Hwy 31 riding with my friend Brian R. when we encountered a slow moving Harley, he was also a Utah 1088 rider - but we didn't know it at that time, a newbie to rallies from what I learned at the banquet, and trust me I wanted to smack him upside the head and so did Brian. Needless to say the FJR dispatched him before he could blink an eye, but before Brian R. could pass him, Brian said the Harley rider sped up and was careening on the edge of losing control trying to catch up to me, Brian backed off and was just hoping that the retard would slow down and not make us have to deal with abandoning the rally and provide assistance to a downed rider, which we would have even if Darwinism was in play.

SacramentoMike said:

You guys name your gears?

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Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

I love these stories - since these things always seem to happen day in and day out upon the bike....

My Favorite, is the Super Tuned Harleys that seem to want a shot at the title...... Its priceless if and when you actually get to stop and talk to those guys - and they tend to reveal they spent the same amount of money to get it to "super tuned", as to what I just spent on a new 15ES.... it just makes me have a bit of a chuckle inside.

My woman, whilst these Neanderthals are making an attempt is, lets just call it, "chatting me up" in my helmet at the same time is no help for me keeping a straight face after all is said and done..

Warpdrv said:

My Favorite, is the Super Tuned Harleys that seem to want a shot at the title...... Its priceless if and when you actually get to stop and talk to those guys - and they tend to reveal they spent the same amount of money to get it to "super tuned", as to what I just spent on a new 15ES.... it just makes me have a bit of a chuckle inside.

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Or DOUBLE what I paid for my 08'

It's so easy I just let them go, laughing quietly inside my helmet.

Naming gears huh? I like that

Maybe mine will be: Launch, Fun, Move along, Beware, Relax.

HotRodZilla said:

One time I double down shifted from passing gear to showoff gear and whacked the throttle. It wasn't until I was next to the Durango that I noticed the door said, "Utah State Highway Patrol." We had a long interesting conversation and I hadn't even gotten to angry gear yet.
BTW, I still love doing that!!

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Let's see: Passing gear was likely 4th, so you doubled down to 2nd. That suggests 'angry' gear is 3rd.

Makes sense, in an HRZ-kinda way.

Never thought of naming gears but now it's going to stick in my head forever. Thanks

Riding home today just be fore the set of curves I like to run through at a quick pace I dispatched two vehicles in a double yellow. Luckily for me the oncoming driver flashed the lights letting me know the locals were setup again. Just in time I tell ya. I gotta slow down before the law of avarages is going to bite me in the ass soon.

Dave

Salish1300 said:

Naming gears huh? I like that

Maybe mine will be: Launch, Fun, Move along, Beware, Relax and Yes officer, license and registration.

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Fixed. For me, anyway.

I haven't named my gears. I was just sticking with Supertankerm60a3's theme.

My gears are named first, second, third, fourth, fifth, and "oh yeah -- there isn't one". Not complaining, if my FJR had a sixth gear, I probably wouldn't have a driver's license.

Only Hooligans name their gears!

Good story Chris!