The Boat Owner and IRS Agent

The IRS suspected
a fishing boat owner wasn't paying proper wages to his Deckhand and sent an agent to investigate him.



IRS AUDITOR: "I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them".



Boat Owner: "Well, there's Clarence, my deckhand, he's been with me for 3 years.


I pay him $1,000 a week plus free room and board.


Then there's the mentally challenged guy.


He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90%


of the work around here. He makes about $10 per week,


pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of Bacardi rum and a dozen Budweiser's every Saturday night so he can cope with life.


He also gets to sleep with my wife occasionally".



IRS AUDITOR: "That's the guy I want to talk to - the mentally challenged one".



Boat Owner: "That would be me. What would you like to know"?

A friend of mine used to refer to self-employment as self-exploitation

Exactly why my commercial fishing career was very short. The crew got the money and the EX. I got the bills.

I have been there myself. Pop and I both had commercial fishing licenses and later both had charter captain's licenses. Seemed like every time there was a decent profit something broke on the damned boat on the next trip that cost more than we made.

Boats are expensive. Part of the reason they always get a female name I think.

If it flies, floats, or f#ck$, it's cheaper to rent it.

Sage advice from an older gentleman that I never forgot.

Redfish Hunter said:

I have been there myself. Pop and I both had commercial fishing licenses and later both had charter captain's licenses. Seemed like every time there was a decent profit something broke on the damned boat on the next trip that cost more than we made.
Boats are expensive. Part of the reason they always get a female name I think.

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After I had been commercial diving for lobsters a year, and could never find a regular partner, and the boat broke three times, I got wind of an old lobster diver that had lost his partner. {not literally, though that did happen occasionally in our industry}. I called him and advanced the idea that we could dive out of his boat one week and mine the next, NOPE, it's my boat or nothing. YEEHAA, I sold my boat, rented my lobster license out, and for the next 7 years HE put the new engines on HIS boat, and paid for all major repairs. {in my defense, I helped, and did as many minor repairs as he would let me, and of course I had to share my catch with him, still a wonderful deal for me, LOL}

And that's why boat stands for Break Out Another Thousand..

MrZappo said:

If it flies, floats, or f#ck$, it's cheaper to rent it.
Sage advice from an older gentleman that I never forgot.

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much like the ole adage...if it has props or tits, better to rent it.