Dumb Assery Rev2, dCarver style

Well hell. My DumbAssery quotient is running high these days. I'm on a streak.

Finally got Naomi ready to ride. Valves, oil, headlight bulbs, minor wire re-routing..

Time to fill the tank with a gallon of petrol and get the old gurl off the lift.

Rock it forward off the center stand, the left foot hits the small 2x4 wood block I use when the bike is on the side stand..

.....and the block of wood kicks out, and in New York second Naomi is on her left side, 1/2 on, 1/2 off the lift.

Shit. Fuck. Shit. Fuck Fuck Fuck.

Call two neighbors ask for help. They immediately arrive and no one even laughs. In my hood, we laugh at *almost* anything or any predicament. But if you screw up good enough, no one laughs.

A quick visual shows the mirror, rear Canyon Cage, rear saddlebag making heavy contact. Shit. I JUST bought and installed new FZ1 mirrors.

Used a small floor jack under the front canyon cage to get the bike 'horizontal'. With 3 grown men we got Naomi back on her feet, with tires just 3 inches from the left edge of the lift.

Carefully rolled her off the lift and examined.

To my total surprise, I got off pretty lucky. Mirror ok. Tank ok. Shift lever ok. Engine cases ok. Exhaust ok.

Right Left bag RASHED.

I'm gonna tell people I had to 'lay her down at 143 to avoid a wreck.'

Actually, one neighbor runs 'DentPro' a mobile dent/scratch fix you up company. He knows a guy....

Out riding Naomi today for her first test run.

What could possibly go wrong?

Don't bother buying any lotto tickets today.

BTDT dropped my Concourse off the lift but it went down on the right side with no protection. 3k in damage with only 2k on the bike.

When I rashed the bags on my 03 FJR I repainted with spray bed liner. Looked good with the silver and was easy to touch up when needed.

I hate myself when I know I should be thinking, "dang, that is really bad luck and I am very sorry it happened to you, and glad it turned out as well as it did", and what I really am thinking is "how did the right bag get damaged, if it fell on it's left side?, this is one of my fears about getting a lift. I better go do something nice for my neighbors".

Oh, well, my wife keeps telling me what a butthead I am, I guess she is right. {but I gotta know about the right bag thing, even if it makes me looks bad. LOL

PS, the "no one laughed thing was the best part, you KNOW you really messed up when even your friends don't laugh".

Carver..... yer a dumbass!

dcarver said:

I'm gonna tell people I had to 'lay her down at 143 to avoid a wreck.'

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Perfect, Don! After all these years, I have finally heard a good reason for "laying her down."

No - not dumb-assery: but avoiding a wreck at 143.

Just the other day you texted me on how great it is to have a lift. Humm.......

philter said:

I hate myself when I know I should be thinking, "dang, that is really bad luck and I am very sorry it happened to you, and glad it turned out as well as it did", and what I really am thinking is "how did the right bag get damaged, if it fell on it's left side?, this is one of my fears about getting a lift. I better go do something nice for my neighbors".
Oh, well, my wife keeps telling me what a butthead I am, I guess she is right. {but I gotta know about the right bag thing, even if it makes me looks bad. LOL

PS, the "no one laughed thing was the best part, you KNOW you really messed up when even your friends don't laugh".

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Good catch! Edited to say left bag.

They say chicks dig scars. Not sure if they mean scars on a motorcycle sidecase.

(My scarred sidecases have not attracted any swooning women.)

Bugnatr said:

Just the other day you texted me on how great it is to have a lift. Humm.......

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Having a lift is great, that's why I have 5 of them. The problem is being smarter than the lift and the machine at the same time.

In a couple of years well be over to take your keys away so you cant ride anymore, maybe we should just show up now and take your tools away immediately! Youre on a roll aint cha ?

HIGHLANDER said:

In a couple of years well be over to take your keys away so you cant ride anymore, maybe we should just show up now and take your tools away immediately! Youre on a roll aint cha ?

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Maybe it's good that 3 of his fleet are in my shop. Two of them are on lifts and haven't tried to jump Yet.

Lift-FJR-Not if but when!

JSNS

dcarver said:

Rock it forward off the center stand, the left foot hits the small 2x4 wood block I use when the bike is on the side stand..
.....and the block of wood kicks out, and in New York second Naomi is on her left side, 1/2 on, 1/2 off the lift.

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I feel your pain. And it's cute that your bike has a name. I generally only address mine when pushing it uphill in a parking lot or whatever. Then it's "you fat f%&king pig."

I solved pig's main problem in the shop by building this. (photo link at end, I think) Ride on, rotate, ride off. And I can drag it around backwards and rotate as needed to keep it out of my way. Except one day I was pushing it forward for whatever stupid reason. One castor hit some unseen trash, the bike rolled forward on the dolly and the sidestand retracted. So there I was in my house slippers trying to hold up the bike while the dolly was skating away from me. Eventually I filled the air with enough curse words that the density increased, slowing momentum and allowing me to get one foot onto the dolly and fully upright the bike. I'm more careful now and that will continue to work well until I forget again. https://cdn1.imggmi.com/uploads/2019/5/11/c1d2e77dd52d1aeb6f26e8b951e4ee9d-full.jpg

Well, Don, update is required. How did she do on the test run? All else is of little consequence.

The higher they are, the harder they fall. Glad there wasn't much damage. I have a lift in my garage and continue to lay on the floor to work on things. What I do is probably a little dumber.

Don, Please don't leave the house. Stay inside do not climb stairs or a ladder. Do not touch any mechanical tools or devices. Stay put. Take your meds then slowly venture out and explore... Just trying to help...

Pterodactyl said:

Well, Don, update is required. How did she do on the test run? All else is of little consequence.

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Put 400 miles on over two days, mostly backroad county road riding. She's running great! Even think I finally figured out my BlueTooth Blues too.

And the paint guy calls me tomorrow morning.

dcarver said:

Pterodactyl said:

Well, Don, update is required. How did she do on the test run? All else is of little consequence.

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Put 400 miles on over two days, mostly backroad county road riding. She's running great! Even think I finally figured out my BlueTooth Blues too.

And the paint guy calls me tomorrow morning.

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I've got some rattle cans of misc paint. I'll bring it along and fix it right up. In return you can fix my bluetooth.